“The mind of a person plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps.”
Proverbs 16:9 (NASB)
Have you ever tried to control God? I know I have. Perhaps not overtly, but I know I have, and for what seemed to me to be good reasons. If I thought I had good reasons, does that mean I wanted to claim God’s power as my own, like Lucifer attempted in heaven?
Since the dawn of sin, time and time again, humankind continues to endeavor to put God in a box. Adam and Eve ate the forbidden fruit, believing that when the snake ate it, he was fine. Perhaps they thought they had some wiggle room in God’s heart. Is there any wiggle room? What about Cain giving fruit as his offering instead of the required lamb? Was he trying to control God?
If we are persistent enough, does God cave in to our whims? If He gave would that make us more powerful and make Him lame? Is that what happened when the children of Israel decided they wanted a king so they could be like the surrounding nations? Did God give in so they could have what they wanted? No.
One author shares this perspective on the matter:
[God] permitted the people to follow their own choice, because they refused to be guided by His counsel. … When men choose to have their own way, without seeking counsel from God, or in opposition to His revealed will, He often grants their desires, in order that, through the bitter experience that follows, they may be led to realize their folly and to repent of their sin.1
The same author wrote:
In the rejection of the ways of God for the ways of men, the downfall of Israel began. Thus also it continued, until the Jewish people became a prey to the very nations whose practices they had chosen to follow.
As a nation, the children of Israel failed to receive the benefits that God desired to give them. They did not appreciate His purpose or co-operate in its execution. But though individuals and peoples may thus separate themselves from Him, His purpose for those who trust Him is unchanged.2
One day in 2010, I took a call from someone on the West Coast. Her name came up on the caller ID, her unusual name. I thought, “There’s only one person in the world with that name, and I know her!” She and her family moved from Michigan to the West Coast when I was about 12, and I hadn’t spoken with them since then. Still, that name was etched in my brain.
I quickly grabbed the phone before anyone else. When we finished business at the Christian book publisher where I worked, I introduced myself. She remembered me. Her response: “Oh … you’re the independent one.”
A little embarrassed, I knew what she said was true, for I have always had an independent spirit, often with a desire to control. However, God has been remarkably long-suffering with me, and for that I am grateful.
When I was caring for my mother, she lived two hours away from my work. I tried to control the situation, commuting every weekend for more than two years through wind, rain, and snow. By April 2017, I was cracking. I was exhausted working four days a week and three days a week tending to my mother’s needs. In the winter, I never saw my house in the daylight. My relationship with God became nearly non-existent.
About that time, I finally cried out to God from the bottom of my pit: “Help me! I can’t live like this anymore.”
Nevertheless, true to my independent nature, I began to handle the situation myself. I started looking for an assisted living facility for my mother. I casually spoke with God about it, but I wasn’t earnest or persistent. I knew a lady at the church’s conference office whose husband and business partner owned such an establishment, so I went to look at it. Mom never wanted to leave home, but I knew the day would come when she wouldn’t be safe in her own home anymore.
Later on, when I finally let go, God worked so many miracles.3 He placed her in a different facility that was perfect for her needs and where she was content. I had been trying to manage the situation, and by so doing, I was also trying to manage God. I just had to surrender the situation to Him so He could work.
Recently, God revealed His power to me again, but I had to let go before He could do anything. Since moving to the Pacific Northwest from Michigan in July 2022, I have had all kinds of issues with water, the car, and many other things, but the Lord has taken care of each one. Even though I’m living my best life, the problems that arise are more dire than ever before. However, I still love living here, and I don’t want to change it, except for heaven.
Recently, I began having more serious issues with my car. However, I wasn’t interested in letting God do anything to change the circumstances of the ever-worsening car. I figured that even if I had a brand-new car, I would still have issues to deal with. Finally, I let go and let God go about His business.
Wednesday morning, March 19, 2025, I prayed, “Father, I am weary. You know what’s best about this car situation. I’m willing to live with the old one, but just do what’s best.”
Apparently, God still has miracles to work for me. Wednesday evening of that very same day, God gifted me with a 2024 Subaru Outback with less than 10,000 miles on it. I had been praying to go back east and see feeble family and friends, but couldn’t with my old car. I’ve lost loved ones since I left there nearly three years ago, but others I want to see again before it’s too late. Seemingly, God agrees. That Subaru Outback—it’s a “Touring” edition, an upgraded model designed for road trips.
I still have quite a spiritual odyssey ahead of me. I don’t know when I’ll learn my lesson about surrendering everything to God and giving up my independent spirit. I desire to give control of my life to Him, for sure. I praise God for His patience and faithfulness to me when I have persistently pushed for my own choices. Thankfully, our heavenly Father does not give in to us but waits for us to turn to Him. He always has the best plans.
Call to Action
First Peter 5:6–7 says: “Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”4
May we choose more humility, allowing God to take care of our problems. Turn them over to Him in the beginning. Allow Him to be in control in our lives, and we will have more peace and joy than ever before. Will you yield your control to our heavenly Father?
“Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that you will abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.”
Romans 15:13 (NASB)
Scripture quotations taken from the (NASB®) New American Standard Bible®, Copyright © 1960, 1971, 1977, 1995, 2020 by The Lockman \ Foundation. Used by permission. All rights reserved. www.lockman.org
- Ellen. G. White, Patriarchs and Prophets (Battle Creek, Michigan: Review and Herald Publishing Association, 1890), 605.
- Ellen G. White, Education (Oakland, California: Pacific Press Publishing Association, 1903), 50 (emphasis added).
- Debi Tesser, “Miracles for Mom,” https://timetogetready.org/miracles/miracles-mom.
- Scripture quotation taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV®. Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.™ Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide.
